But in the same time, I had also wonderful, long-term friendships with (straight and gay) men. The way to do this is to match your preferences needs values and life purpose to a particular venue to find a quality person an individual. In simple terms, you wanted her; however, you didn't need her. Which brings us to the next question- for you to say? That's 3,179,525 Americans minus 31795 = 3,147,730.